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Edited by Elaine Ramirez (elaine@groovekorea.com) COvER STORy The dark side The challenge of forming his iden- tity doesn’t stop when he steps off the set. When he first started rising to fame, his lifestyle changed as he found himself doing what he thought people expected of him, something he constantly sees among emerging celebrities. “People who are famous here in Korea are expected to wear certain clothes, or do certain things or go to certain restaurants and bars,” he recalls. No one forced the celebrity lifestyle on him, but he found himself getting sucked into the vanity, buying designer crap he never used to care about. “There’s so much hype that comes with a job like this that you can get caught up in. … I was buying things that I never had any interest in because that’s what I thought people did.” But when the curtains closed on his “Gag Concert” gig, the starry-eyed ris- ing actor faced a harsh reality check as his finances dried up. “When you’re behind on the rent, you can’t afford to pay your bills and there’s no work all of a sudden, that allows you to focus more on the big picture,” he says. After years of ups and downs, he realized how hard it is to maintain the good times but all too easy to get caught up in the celebrity hype. He’s found positive reflections to the bad times, and now he’s not concerned with other people’s expectations. “Now, I buy things that I want to buy, I wear things that I want to wear. ... I think the important thing is you have to stay true to yourself.” That’s a challenge that goes far be- yond pricey fashion labels and luxuri- ous lifestyles. Staying true to oneself is easier said than done for most people, no less a comedian. Hammington has watched many people in his industry get lost in the job. “When you’ve got a job and you’re trying to enlighten other people’s lives and make other people happy … there’s a downside that comes with that,” he says. Comedians are typically thought of as people who can laugh their way through difficult situations, but usual- ly there is a darkness eclipsed by the bright humor. The link between come- dy and depression has resurfaced with the recent suicide of Robin Williams. In a role that manipulates people’s emotions, turning stress, worries and sadness into laughter, it’s the come- dian’s job to help you forget about your worries. But who is there to do that for them? “Robin Williams was a prime example. You look at a guy like that. Whenever you saw him on TV he was always so funny and jovial,” Ham- mington says in a serious tone many Korean fans would not recognize, “but he had dark sides as well. He dealt with addiction and depression. And that’s a common thread with comedi- ans throughout the world.” Charlie Chaplin, Jerry Lewis, Jon- athan Winters, Richard Pryor, John Cleese, John Belushi and Chris Farley are but some comedians who have admitted to struggling with inner de- mons. “I’ve gone through slumps,” Hammington confesses, “but not to those extents. I know a lot of people in the industry that struggle with lone- liness. It is a lonely profession.” It even takes a toll on his work to not be able to interact with people, whose stories and antics give him the inspiration for his gags or routines. Hammington acknowledges that it’s hard to socialize like the average per- son when he’s constantly wary of his surroundings. Friends who are fellow actors or comedians are still competi- tors in a cutthroat industry, and friends outside of entertainment are wary of the crowds. “This is the thing a lot of people don’t know about. You know, about the restrictions that come with this sort of life. They all think … you’ve got all those fans, it’s great, but they don’t realize it takes you maybe an hour to go a hundred meters,” he says. “The whole socializing thing and going out with friends to the bar for a few beers is not what it used to be. When you’ve got people coming up to you asking for photos, just sitting there and hav- ing to chat with people becomes an exercise.” While he’s well aware and apprecia- tive of all his fans — they’re the rea- son he can keep going, after all — he is firm that he has to draw the line. “I’m always generally really apologetic. When someone asks me in the middle of dinner, I’ll say, ‘Look, I’m sorry, I’m in the middle of eating.’ … When I’m in the bathroom I won’t be as apolo- getic,” he quips. Fortunately for him, he can go out with friends who will diffuse the situation for him. “It helps having friends that are really under- standing.”